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September 26, 2002

Purity

months and months
consecutive new heights
climbing a holiness ladder
limbs of light
branchings illuminated
learning inside and out’s
limitless unity

last night’s ritual
pre–burial washing
restoration of dignity and kedushah
to a lifeless ninety year–old

arrives defiled,
plastic bagged and intubated
silica   adhesives   liquid   impacted
refrigerated;
rolled to a tiled basement workshop

we prepare
nick the seams of hospital sheets
scream the fabric, rent to rags
small mourning, sackcloth echoes
carrying away and carrying forth
waters

we purify
fingertips thrice washed
latex gloves, coveralls, pull–over boots
disposable

unzipped
his face and genitals are covered
we stand at his head only when necessary
nothing is passed over him
water basins are filled
the mikvah is filled
the rags are filled with blood, waste
the blood is kept

his face is uncovered
I wash his neck
he is turned on his left side
I hold his head
is that a smile thawing?

((thoughts of the deceased’s family
the rawness of loss
my uncertainty at their presence
and my responsibility to them
not to detract from their mourning
to make their comfort as great as possible
and my implications in authoring this))

published two months after authoring, 1 Dec ‘02